“Relationships require psychological growth”

Human relationships are powerful, and are sometimes subject to a range of outside influences. Atikul Islam, 24, a Commonwealth Correspondent from Bogra in Bangladesh, argues this makes a strong case for arranged marriages.

When a human child is born, he or she  usually loves his or her parents, brothers, sisters, and relatives who care for, are affectionate to, and love this new person.

In childhood he or she has school friends and playing partners. Here, the school friends play a vital role in the sound growth of the child, while parents are in the shadow, from childhood to adulthood. Those parents who have a good relationship with their child from childhood to adulthood can better help their children’s psychological growth.

Children who don’t get proper affection love and support from their parents, relatives and companions can have psychological pressure and disappointment. Disappointment is a great curse for the human child and adult, because both the child and adult need to be encouraged to know that they are capable enough to ensure their good future.

In our country, some children don’t get education because of economic scarcity in the family. Some study at a local school or madrasah, but may be disappointed that education from poor conditions can not secure their employment.  Children and adults in our country should assured that by achieving good academic results one can get good job. Only through studying, sound expression of skill, and wit can good employment be ensured.

In the teenage period, the child wants the affection of their opposite sex. Here he or she cannot speak their mind due to societal obligation. Love begins in one’s heart, usually when one believes that someone may like him, or may convince someone to like him or her. But here there can be total depression when his dreams are false and he cannot convince his loved one.

If the boy and girl are from two opposite families, such as rich and poor, love often causes psychological pressure to them. Girls under 18, in my country, are usually considered to be children. But it is also true that if a clever boy wants to convince a girl of an elite family, he will try. Even an uneducated boy of bad character can convince an elite, educated girl child by talking  with a very sweet tongue and lavishing much time. But the family of the rich girl cannot welcome the relationship. There are reports that the unwanted suitor could be arrested for child harassment.

But any relationship between boys and girls from the same educational background and family background can have an impact on their psychological growth. The boys and girls find both pleasure and pain in any relationship.

The human mind changes for different reasons. To keep up a relationship for a long time can be really difficult. Boys and girls can like each other for some time, but if any third person is introduced to them, the relationships may switch. Every mind wants to grow bigger and bigger. As one becomes a better friend or a better person for marriage, the mind also changes. The pressure of family members may also cause the mind to change.

So adult boys and girls have to make relationship decisions rationally, not by emotion, considering themselves and their families. Arranged marriage is better for adults to keep themselves and their families sound psychologically.

Photo credit: Morguefile.com

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About me: I am a youth writer on different social issues. Presently I am working at a bank. Writing is my pleasure, and I write as my pastime.

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Opinions expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily represent the views of the Commonwealth Youth Programme. Articles are published in a spirit of dialogue, respect and understanding. If you disagree, why not submit a response?

To learn more about becoming a Commonwealth Correspondent please visit: http://www.yourcommonwealth.org/submit-articles/commonwealthcorrespondents/

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